Monday, December 1, 2014

LJ's Easy-Peasy French Toast Recipe

Okay, here's my recipe for the 3 Seas Inaugural Joint Author Promotion event on their Facebook page.

Keep in mind two things:

  1. I can't cook. I've burned water. Literally. I'd have starved to death years ago if it weren't for my husband; and
  2. Since I just found out that I can actually write a post and schedule it to release on a later date (Joy!), I'm still doped up on the cold meds mentioned in the last post while I write this. 

Okay, this recipe is special to me because it's literally almost the only thing I can cook without the use of a microwave. I don't remember where I learned it, but I've known it for a long time now and I break it out occasionally on the odd Sunday for breakfast.

Here's the recipe.

LJ's Easy-Peasy French Toast

  • milk
  • eggs
  • vanilla
  • cinnamon
  • nutmeg
  • cloves
  1. Get up wondering why you're awake on a Sunday morning
  2. Drink coffee
  3. Drink coffee
  4. Pet the cat
  5. Decide you're hungry
  6. Find a frypan and some sort of dish big enough to hold a slice of bread and some liquid without getting it all over the counter.
  7. Crack maaaaybe three eggs into the dish
  8. Add a couple blorps of milk into the dish (uh, maybe a quarter cup? I literally pour it in and listen to it go "blorp blorp"
  9. Grab the vanilla bottle, pour it and count to two
  10. Add a bunch of dashes of the cinnamon, nutmeg, and cloves
  11. Stir up the whole thing with a fork
  12. Remember to turn on the stove, set to HIGH cause you have no patience (if you do and/or want to be able to walk away from the stove without testing your fire alarm, set it lower)
  13. Drink coffee
  14. Put a piece of bread into the egg mixture. Let it soak a couple seconds, flip it over. Let it get to your preferred soggy level
  15. Slap the bread into the pan (repeat if you have room for more than one)
  16. Watch the pan sizzle and drink coffee.
  17. Check the bottom of the bread numerous times to see if it looks cooked.
  18. Flip the bread over. 
  19. Push the bread randomly around the pan with a spatula while it cooks.
  20. Put everything on a plate
  21. Go wake up the husband and find out he wants one piece less than you just cooked.
  22. Realize you're out of maple syrup
  23. Enjoy!